I posted a photo of mine and Gul Panag in our familly group and everybody was laughing on some joke. I also put some joke that Kanika is jealous of this pic and she is not talking :)
She took this literally in bad shape. Why are you putting me in this? This and that. Bla-bla. And she continued this for long. I had to go for injection dose, I left without saying anything.
I was wondering that she had never gone to college or she had never some friends with which she could laugh and laugh on silly talks. She was like this always. She could get anger on anything, literally anything. I was wondering, if she could take this lightly and just laugh. Any kid can tell that it was just a joke.
I could not sleep last night well. Her behavior reminded me of her usual behavior again. She was behaving like a changed person from lst December. When I just said her, that we are separating.
I think a person can not be changed. I was thinking that one day she will show her colors. And, I think she just came out of that. Lets see, how it goes.

Yesterday Again - Her She Showed Her Usual Side Again!

If someone repeatedly told you to close the unnecessary running switches, then what would be your response?
OK, I will do it.&nbsp;
OR
I forgot it, I will take care next time.
OR
Sorry, I forgot again. I will do it.
<h2>Context</h2>
Its about the few switches which I spotted daily. Her laptop socket switch, kitchek fan socket switch. I'm switching them off daily in night. After every 4-5 days, I casually say to her that please keep them closed. It result in wastage of electricity. Sometimes, she said. OK. But, she never does them. Not a single time.
Yesterday, I got irritated. And, said to her.
Didn't you see these things, you are standing in front of the running socket light. Which is not needed, don't you feel the need to close it. She got irritated again.
Her response:
I can't do it. And, don't say this thing daily. If its running, let it be. I was like, then there is no point of saying this. Its wastage of electricity.
Some things are since our marriage of last 14 years. I'm constantly harassed by her behavior, by her attitude. If she could politely say these things, I would have been be OK. But...

<h2>Origin</h2>
Actually, these things come from home. My father taught me not to waste electricity. If I'm not sitting in a room, why to keep its fan running.&nbsp;
I remember in our initia marriage days. She would kept everything running in our home unnecessarily. My usual habit was to close the unnecessary running things. She got irritated. She rather shout on me if I say these things to her.&nbsp;
I can not switch-off them everytime I left the room. I was like WOW.
Later, I come to know that her family never paid the electricity bill at home. They had the habit of using elctricity by illegal means, they never paid the bills. And, they understand no value of these things.&nbsp;
But, she should understand that we pay the bills.
And, I remember when her brother told me that electricity department guys caught them one day. And, they had to pay a fine of around 1Lakh Rs. After which I think they started using electricity judiciously. Lesson for them.
But, you can't change the root of a person. If she brought up in an environment where these things are normal. Nobody can change it.

She behaves just like old days on few things

She asked, what will you take in breakfast. I normally do not tell her anything.&nbsp;
My usual response: "Kuch bhi bana lo". To which, she angrily said. You never tells me anything.
I said, "Parantha". She again angrily said. You always say Parantha. I will not make it today. This is her response from last N years. I said, then why do you ask. This is your response always. I dont want to get hurt always. She went away.
Its not ike that she does not make parantha. The problem is, whenever she asks something from me, she never made that. EVen if its Parantha, Pulao. She makes it as per her wish.

What you will eat in breakfast - Usual Respose - She did not change

I was looking for a design revamp of planndesign.com. Its been an old design in bootstrap, designed by me. This time, I was completely revamping the technology stack as well.

I decided to get the design in Tailwind-CSS by looking at its simplicity and its becoming famous.

First, I thought to give this work to my full-time hired developer Abdul. But, I realized that he will also not be able to justify it, as he is not a designer. I thought I will do it. But, I realize that it will take a lot of time. It's better to outsource this. I looked for freelancers.

Finally, I hired this energetic guy Meet on freelancer.com

We fixed the final delivery on 12th March 2022. But, he could not do it. 

He said bla-bla. I was involved in a personal emergency. He said, he is more serious in it than me. I was like, OK. I said OK. I again asked for a final date. he gave me 24th March 2022. And, he said: Chillax. I was getting annoyed by him. After delaying by almost double the fixed date, you are saying Chillax. I was like ok.

But, when he did not deliver it on 24th. I lost my mind. I warned him, that I will wait for him today only. Then, he asked for releasing the payment. I said, what is the meaning of milestone. When we decided. You did not even showed me anything. How can I release the payment.

I knew, that he did not complete it. I bluntly said, I know you did not complete it, but I will wait for today only. He had lot of excuses, I did cut the phone.

I mean, why did you take the work, when you can not do it. It wasted my 25 days.

Why did you take the work Freelancer - Fedup

Its been a complete season gone, and our work is not finishing. Its related to our new flat. We have done massive work here. Except from Electrician Jitender, everybody gave trouble. Its too difficult to handle labor. 

Now, these painter guys. They went to holidays without telling anything. Our shifting dates kept on shifting due to lot of people. First, the contractor Ramesh, then Carpenter Sudhir, now this painter.

I don't understand, these people don't want to work and earn. They have lot of attitude and ego. 

This painter used to come at site at 11:30 and leave by 5/5:30. And, holidays on weekend.

Today, I did my office from this flat to see when they are coming, but they did not come.

I did message to them, one last time. If they are not coming by tomorrow, no money no stuff, nothing. Enough is enough.

Completing House Work - Too Difficult a Task - Too difficult to handle Labors

I pick him from school when his classes finishes at around 12:30 PM. As I reach his school, I handed over the escort card to guards. I kept waiting for him, and kept rolling my eyes in school, searching for him. Sometimes, I started worried when he won't come in few minutes.

When I get a sight of his, I always smile saying there is our hero. I think every parent think of same, I'm just writing my emotion here.

I hold his heavy bag, and asked him the usual question: How was the day? Did you do fun?

Taking Daksh from School - Happy to see him

Schools are open after 2 years, due to Covid. Daksh was very excited to goto school. Since, its only 15 days of school in this month. I decided to drop him to school.

As we have to drop our kids at the school gate. I dropped him, and he went straight inside. I kept watching him untill I lose sight of him. I was afraid inside as I was leaving him. As a parent, where kids are living under your care and protection. When kids go outside, its a constant fear for their safety.

Inside, I felt proud about him. How kids adapt themself to face this world. 

Afraid to See Daksh Going Alone in School - Kids Growing

Since when Daksh started playing Chess. I also started playing, and I got so addicted to it that I play 20-40 games a day. That too, after so much control. These are live games, and take lot of time.

My ranking got all time high in 5 minutes Blitz.

Chess Ranking Update for 5 minute Blitz Rounds - My Addiction

Today, I got news that one more guy is leaving Adobe. Adhunik Gupta.

He was one of the guy with whom I'm impressed the most. When I first met him, he was almost 1 year experience. But, the way he talked, the way he solved problems, the way he explained something was something to learn from him. 

Over the years, he proved himself as one of the most reliable and most important team member. He is also one of stylish person. I liked the way he talks.

He is joining Google-london. Which suits his skill set and style. Anything lesser than Google will not suit him. I wish him all the best in life.

Adhunik Resigned - Google London

This year 2022, we have to get her admission finally to a school. As, she is turning 4 this year, and this is high time. Daksh is also studying in the same school.

The disadvantage in her case was that she has never went to some play-school. Due to Covid times, the schools were closed for full 2 years. We recently get her admitted to an online play-school footprints. Thanks to her mother, brother and youtube. She knew many things. She speaks english well. Sometimes, I even surprised how well she composed her sentences.

Let me tell you the story of her admission:

Bhavika is very very shy kid. Recently, I visited my maternal home. We stayed there for 5 days. But, she did not speak a single word to my brothers/bhabhi etc. Even, we did not get a chance to hear her clear voice. She spoke so slow there. Due to covid times as well, she never visited any physical school or any neighbours or parks. So, she has negligible social presence.

We filled her admission form online, and she got a call almost immediately for an interaction.

It was a google meet call. Where teacher asked so many things like drawing, name of animals, etc and etc. She responded so well. Maa'm gave a clean chit.

Second Interaction with the Principal Maam

So, first interaction was not enough. We had a second call and this time we parents, also had to sit with her. It was a call on mobile. Bhavika was excited. But, when the time came for her to speak. She did not speak a single word. The problem was that the principal madam was not speaking well according to kids. And, Bhavika got scared. I was so pissed-off with Bhavika that she did not speak anything. I tried to cover up for her. But her principal maam, said that there will be another round of interaction in school.

We were kind of angry to school that how many rounds you want from a 3 year old kid!

So, I took 2 hours off from office and we went to school. This time, we we made a plan. We took Daksh with us. And, I asked Daksh to let her engage in some activity and make her speak. We tried some combinations of tricks that Bhavika loves. 

Anyway, we reached school. There was rush of parents. Our turn came up fast. We all went in a room with a senior madam. She was very sweet, and the way she interacted with her was so cool. But, Bhavika was shy as usual. But, this time she was replying her. She learned some rhymes. But she did not sing that after so many requests. She interacted with Daksh as well. As he is from the same school. So, it was an advantage with us. She opened up an animal book, and asked names of many animals. Bhavika responded pretty well. She answered with the names which I was not even aware of, like Star-Fish, Crab :)

Anyway, she gave us a hint that its all ok. Her coordinator maam, Ritu told us to go back as principal madam was having a meeting. And, she straight away gave us the amount that we need to deposit if principal maam agrees. She said, 99.99% is done, but wait for principal maam.

We were sured of the admission. We had a Pizza Party that night. Daksh enjoyed it.

I got a call today (22 Feb 2022) that her admission is confirmed, and deposit the fee. She gave us a discount of 20% in the admission fee. 10% for sibling and 10% as girl child.

We had to deposit total of 119,500 Rs which includes one quarter fee. Its pretty expensive. I hate this about Noida.

But, I was very happy. Bhavika cleared her life's first exam. And, she joined the club of students.

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Bhavika finally got admission to Gyanshree School - Not an easy one!

Instantly, one thing came to my mind that she got some offer or so.

I called her, and she started speaking like giving an official status. I laughed and congratulated her.

She gave her official resignation to Suman. She said, Suman did not like it, and was not expecting this.

The times are very challenging for management. Lot of people are leaving...

I think managers should be ready for this. They should make them feel happy and congratulate them on their progress.

I will write more about Shriya later. She was an intern, worked with me for most of her internship.

Shriya Leaving Adobe - Microsoft

Hitesh had to come to greater noida for a wedding event of his friend. He planned to meet in greater noida, with Ayush. I had no car, as Kanika took it her home. I took an Uber, reached there at Pari chowk. While waiting at Pari chowk, it reminded me of my old days, when I used to wait for bus in a crowded place. Now, the time has changed. Its a luxury, lets appreciate it. 

We went to some boring mall, and we had to goto Venice mall. We went there, and kept on talking about shitty things. When Hitesh and I talk, our direction move towards startups/life. I tried a lot not to talk about these things. But, when we talk, our direction goes there automatically.

Ayush must be thinking, what is wrong with these guys. Overall, it was a good time. 

We took some Nawabi chai from a small cafe: "Chai Le lo". And, the tea was really awesome, I forgot to take the pic. In lunch, we had chur-chur naan.

A meet with Hitesh and Ayush

Since last few months, lot of oldies left Adobe, our team. Its a big blow to our team.

Ankit Rustagi left Adobe

Its an usual weekend, and we went to park to play. Some kids brought rabbit and birds in the park.

Bhavika was so happy to see them. Daksh and Bhavika both played with them.

Bhavika played with Rabbit

Its been 2 weeks since I'm not talking to her. And, believe me, its so much good life. I'm not listening to her anger, frustration, ego.
And, look at her ego. She talked to me 4 days before asking, "bahut acha lag raha hai aise?".
I just said, you leave your anger and we can talk. To which, she just walked-off.
I mean, all I'm asking her to drop her anger while talking to me. She just cant do this.

And, this relationship is going nowhere. Divorce is the only option that I felt will be good for us. I'm not able to initiate any action.

2 Successful Weeks in not talking to her

Pankaj Bansal from another team approached my manager, and he sugested my name to him as Java Expert to take interview for his team.

I focused on Java and little on Micro services. He was 9 years experience.

Overall, I rejected him with a strong No.

Gorav Singal

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