Today, I saw a girl was getting beaten up by her mother. She was crying, alone. I asked her to come to me. Then a man said, his father died sometime before, and she says her father has gone to holidays.I instantly cried for you Bhavika. Remembering, I was your pillar of strength, which looked always. After going everywhere, you came to me, for support, for strength. You knew I was there for you always.Now, I'm not there. It pained me so much. Remembering you, always brought me so much tears instantly.&nbsp;I still says, I'm there for you always. These are bad times. I just wish that GOD gave your mother some budhhi that she understands that we two never had any relation but our kids needs their father too. I'm lying helpless here. But, Im fighting in court for your custody and visitation rights.&nbsp;Im far from you, but remember whenever you call me. I will near you, with you, for any kind of support.Forgive me my child, for giving this pain. Pain of separation.I love you, love you very very much.I believe in GOD, and Im sure he will help us meeting again, soon.&nbsp;

Bhavika... God will help us meet again...

Yesterday was my birthday. I'm 41 now.Im feeling as if I'm starting my life exactly 17 years ago. Searching for work, living a bachelor life, struggling for daily chores.&nbsp;

Im 41

Time has come to say good bye to Adobe.Team mates wrote some really nice words…<a href="https://www.kudoboard.com/boards/Znw9woaZ#view">https://www.kudoboard.com/boards/Znw9woaZ#view</a>&nbsp;Yesterday was my farewell… Will update more…

Bye Bye Adobe - Finally After 14 years - Farewell

She is sick these days, and she told me that you do not even call me to know about me. I went home, I do not feel like even see her. I try to ignore her.Even she know this. These days, its her brother wedding, that's why she is behaving normal. Else, she can not say few words with love.I feel like I'm done, what she has done over the years. I have nothing for her. I have told her this many times.Something is dead from inside.&nbsp;

I don't feel anything with K

We have so much friction in us, that we can not talk even for 2 mins.In almost every talk, either she or me gets so irritated. In my case, she just want her point to be implemented. There is no respect of mine. She always shows her irritated face.Yesterday, we have to buy cloths for Shivam's marriage. Ankit suggested her that we purchased it from jwalapur, it might be cheap as well. I told her, if we are going to see things, we can buy from here as well as time also is less. She straight away rejected, saying No. blablabla.After seeing the things, she talked to Ankit. Now she wanted to buy those things. I told her that when I told you you did not agree. She again shows her irritated and angered face. I just couldn't stand against her.&nbsp;Our grah never matched. I can not share my inner thoughts, what I feel, what I'm going through. It's so much frustrating at times, that why me GOD?

We can not talk for 2 mins - So much friction

I'm getting late daily in the morning. I do optimize/tune my time as per need. I getup at 5:40-5:45 in morning, get ready, then goto milk. I came to this routine after lot of experiments. I do this so that kids can goto school on time, and I also save some time.But, she always has a late time. If she has 5 mins, she will sleep. She wake up at a time, when she has no extra time for kids. If any kid do vomit or anything else, she doesn't have time. Everything will be hush hush.Even then, I'm getting late daily. I'm pushing her every 2-3 days, that please wakeup 5-6 mins early, what the hell will go wrong if you getup early. But no. She always has reasons, and ego to fight back.I know how rash and fast I have to drive daily due to her.&nbsp;

Kanika always do late in school time - Everything should be on or after time as per her

Its a Sunday morning. I was working my work as usual. She wakeup at around 8:45, came to me and asked to wake-up kids. I said, let them sleep. She said, Bhavika has a dance class at 11. I said ok, you try to wake them up in between.It was 9:20 when I went. I saw them sleeping. I just said, you could also wake up them up. She was like, I was coming.I hurriedly let kids bath. I dressed up Bhavika as usual. She did not prepare the breakfast even till 10:40. I did puja as well. I talked little, why the breakfast is not ready when she has to go. She was like, I'm preparing.&nbsp;Then, it was 10:50, and I had to shout a little. Why the hell you always do things on time or late. You knew she has to go. Breakfast is not ready. WHy the hell you could not get ready before time, why you always keep in hurry mode. ALways running. If you get ready 5 mins before, if things get ready 5 mins before, will there be any issue?The work which is mine, you never try to touch them as if your hands would burn. If I had to wakeup kids, you never try to wake up them up, if I bath her, you never try, if I help her dressed up, you never. I feed her breakfast, you never.&nbsp;In the meantime, I got the breakfast. I fed Bhavika, and I had to leave. I could not complete breakfast, not even Bhavika.&nbsp;I'm totally fedup with her late antics.&nbsp;I took Bhavika to dance class, came back after having her enjoyed in park. I saw, my plate of breakfast was open, without covering anything. I was again cursing my bad luck with her. SHe could not covered my breakfast as when I will come, I could eat them. That was all in bad condition.Too poor from her. And in all of this, there is no word like sorry from her. She infact shouted back about all this. Her ego always come between us.

Fedup with Her Late Time Management Habits

Last year was very difficult, in terms of money. I received income tax request of around 8-9L last year, plus house expenses. I bought a house, and its work was going on.Recently, I got a payment request for one of my investment in Bhutani property. It was for around 8L. I did not had that money. I mean, I had to sell my company stocks, or the indian stocks that I invested. Which I didn't want to.I was discussing this with Kanika, and I was feeling frustrated. She said, you can take it from me, and return in few months. I clearly said, what is the benefit of you earning. Why do I have to return it. isn't it your investment. For the first time, I said this to her.Her reply was, You have to manage house expenses by yourself. I again said, why I need to return then. And, what do you mean by trouble. Do I need to be a begger to ask you for money.&nbsp;She had no reply! I also moved on, I knew no point of arguing with her.I had to run this family, and I will. God bless us.But, it will always be a point of frustration for me. I spend lot of time in her business, to build for her. But, I get nothing. She sometimes pays for her suits, to which she proudly says I buy it from my money. I was about to ask, what about my money, its not mine, its us. But, your money is yours.It feels bad to have a spouse who earns for herself, not for family.&nbsp;

What is the benefit of her earning - I finally asked

Either you don't invite people to your functions, or if you are inviting people, then invite them well.

I have encountered many situations where its kind of problematic situation whether to go or not. The other person has not invited well.

So, the person is Raman, a distant relative. I don't even has his mobile number in my phone. There is a marriage function of his son. He invited my brother well, who lives in other city. Now, he is coming in Noida, and asked if he invited you. 

That person sent me a whatsapp message, which contains only a pdf. No Hi/hello, No other message. The person has not even his profile photo in whatsapp. I generally ignored these kind of messages. And, I ignored it.

My brother asked, whether you got the card. I said no. I checked, that. invitation was his. I also did not even reply, as if I would reply he might put a message to come. 

But, this is very bad practice of inviting people like this.

A well invited invitation means, at least you call the invitee, and asked him/her to come. What do you mean by a whatsapp message. You are completing your duty, so that when someone asked you did not invite, you will say I have invited. WTF.

I got a call few days back in evening. It was not hearable at all. I could recognise him, and said Namastay. I said repeatedly, your voice is not coming. He simply cut the call, and did not call. I waited for his call.

OK, next morning, I called him back at around 11. He said, bete ki saai hai. I said, Many congrats. And, he again cut the call.

He never said a single time, that you are invited or you have to come. How can someone go like this. 

An Uninvited Invitation

Although, this is my hobby project, and I'm thinking of going ahead in this.

Today, I bought another name: lifeinreel.com

I have some ideas in this space. Lets see.

Lifeintext Next - Life in Pics/Videos

Kanika never ever tried to ask kids to goto bed on time, she is on the mobile most of the time in night. Kids are growing old. Daksh talks badly if I ask him to go inside. As I have to wakeup early, to bring milk and get ready. But, nobody gave it a heed, specially Kanika.Yesterday, Kanika was using her mobile since 12:30 in night, and Bhavika was not sleeping because of this. Bhavika kept on singing in night. I could hear it from the room where I was sleeping. I asked Kanika to please stop your mobile, she instantly shouted in night. I'm using mobile in pure silent mode, kids are not aware that I'm using mobile. I was like, why are you shouting in night.&nbsp;

My routine is all disturbed because of kids and her

i grew up in a place without buses, or perhaps a place where i believed that the buses were not meant for me.now i meet the driver's eyes as he tells me to move to let other people pass. now i press the stop button when someone can't reach it. now i awkwardly wave someone more attractive to me toward an empty seat. now i feel more awkward when they let me have the seat.now i am surrounded by people that i don't know, people that i will probably never see again. i am lonely. i am in awe. i want to make connections but can't make the first step.

april 24th, 2025

&nbsp;<h2>Discovering the Wild Heart of Odisha: A Journey Through Its National Parks</h2>Odisha, the land of temples and tribal cultures, holds within its borders a lesser-known treasure — its rich and vibrant national parks. These sanctuaries are a haven for wildlife enthusiasts, nature lovers, photographers, and anyone looking to escape into the raw beauty of the Eastern Ghats and coastal plains. Let’s dive into the natural wonders Odisha has to offer!<h2>1. Simlipal National Park – The Crown Jewel</h2>Located in the Mayurbhanj district, Simlipal is the most prominent <a href="https://orissatours.com/wildlife-sanctuaries/">national park in Odisha</a>. Once a royal hunting ground, it now serves as a UNESCO Biosphere Reserve, spreading across 2,750 square kilometers. It’s famous for:Royal Bengal Tigers, leopards, elephantsOver 1,000 species of flowering plantsThe majestic Barehipani and Joranda waterfallsDense sal forests and grasslandsSimlipal is a paradise for eco-tourism and a must-visit if you're craving adventure mixed with biodiversity.<h2>2. Bhitarkanika National Park – India’s Mini Amazon</h2>Tucked away in the Kendrapara district, Bhitarkanika is a unique wetland ecosystem, home to:The largest population of saltwater crocodiles in IndiaRare species like the white crocodile and king cobraOver 270 species of birds, including migratory ones like the Asian openbill storkMangrove forests and tidal rivers perfect for boating safarisThis park offers a different flavor of wilderness — wild, watery, and teeming with life.<h2>3. Nandankanan Zoological Park – Where the Wild Roam Free</h2>Though not a traditional national park, Nandankanan in Bhubaneswar deserves mention. It’s a zoological-cum-botanical park with open enclosures where animals roam in natural habitats. It’s known for:White tigers, black panthers, and gharialsA large safari park and aquariumConservation breeding centersLush greenery and tranquil lakesGreat for families and school trips, Nandankanan is a gateway to wildlife education in Odisha.<h2>Best Time to Visit</h2>October to March is ideal for pleasant weather and increased chances of spotting wildlife.Avoid the monsoon (June to September) as many areas remain closed or become inaccessible.<h2>Travel Tips</h2>Carry binoculars and a camera — you will want to capture these moments.Dress in earthy tones to blend with the forest environment.Respect the sanctity of the parks: avoid littering, making loud noises, or disturbing animals.

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Tiger-Reserve-Odisha.jpg

National Park In Odisha

&nbsp;<h2>From Chandipur to Dublagadi: A Coastal Journey Worth Taking</h2>Odisha's coastline is dotted with hidden gems, and the stretch from Chandipur to Dublagadi (Bagda Sea Beach) is one of those underrated yet unforgettable routes. Whether you're a nature lover, a beach bum, or someone looking for a peaceful escape, this coastal drive has something magical to offer.<h3>Distance &amp; Travel Time</h3>The <a href="https://orissaguide.com/bagda-sea-beach-dublagadi-balasore-odisha/">Chandipur To Dublagadi Distance</a>&nbsp;is approximately 34 to 35 kilometers. The drive takes about 45 minutes to 1 hour, depending on the traffic and the exact route you take.Most travelers opt for the Dublagadi Road, which is locally known as Bagda Sea Beach Road. It’s a smooth ride through lush greenery, with the salty breeze hinting at the sea waiting at the end.<h3>Route Highlights</h3>Chandipur-on-Sea: Famous for its vanishing sea phenomenon, where the water recedes up to 5 km during low tide—truly a one-of-a-kind experience.Rustic villages: En route, you’ll pass by quaint fishing villages and paddy fields, giving you a slice of Odisha’s rural charm.Casuarina forests: Nearing Dublagadi, dense coastal forests line the road, creating a dramatic change in scenery that feels almost cinematic.<h3>Dublagadi (Bagda Sea Beach)</h3>Once you arrive at Dublagadi, you’re greeted by a serene, less-crowded beach with soft sands and a backdrop of casuarina trees. This beach is still untouched by mass tourism, making it ideal for camping, photography, and quiet reflection. On a lucky day, you might even spot red crabs dotting the shoreline.There are eco-resorts and camping facilities available if you want to stay overnight—and trust me, watching the sunrise here is worth waking up early for.<h3>Pro Travel Tip</h3>If you’re traveling in the monsoon or post-rain, check the road conditions beforehand. While the route is generally good, rural roads can get a bit bumpy in bad weather.<h3>Final Thoughts</h3>The drive from Chandipur to Dublagadi is more than just a change in location—it’s a transition from the known to the wild, from touristy shores to hidden coastal sanctuaries. If you’re planning a trip to Odisha, don’t miss out on this beautiful short journey.

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Chandipur To Dublagadi Distance

i want to try journaling again; i haven't written a diary since i was a kid.my life is like walking through a dense forest lately. every time i walk around a tree, everything looks the same but different. everything is new and scary and exciting and good and bad, all at the same time.i want to write fanfics. i want to write journal entries. i want to learn how to write essays for a ged i'll probably fail. i want to eat. i want to sleep. i want to read books and manga and light novels. i want to kiss some guy i've only seen through a youtube video, but not in a romantic way, just in an appreciation because he's talented way. like how people kissed the hands of kings of old.i want i want i want i wanti crave companionship and money and things most normal people want. i just don't know how to get those things yet.

april 23rd, 2025

&nbsp;Discovering the Wild Heart of Odisha: National Parks You Must ExploreOdisha, nestled on the eastern coast of India, is often celebrated for its ancient temples and vibrant tribal culture. But beyond its architectural marvels and traditional festivals, Odisha also hides a thriving wilderness—home to some of India's most captivating <a href="https://orissatours.com/wildlife-sanctuaries/">odisha national park</a> and wildlife sanctuaries.Whether you're a nature enthusiast, a wildlife photographer, or just someone looking to escape into the serene embrace of the forest, Odisha’s national parks offer something magical.<h3>1. Simlipal National Park – A Royal Retreat for Tigers and Elephants</h3>Located in the Mayurbhanj district, Simlipal National Park is a UNESCO World Network of Biosphere Reserves site and arguably Odisha's most renowned wildlife sanctuary. Spanning over 2,750 square kilometers, this park is a haven for Bengal tigers, wild elephants, leopards, and gaurs.Simlipal is not just about big cats and thick sal forests—it's also home to stunning waterfalls like Barehipani and Joranda, and tribal villages that offer a glimpse into ancient lifestyles harmonized with nature.Best time to visit: November to mid-June Highlights: Jungle safaris, birdwatching, nature treks, waterfalls<h3>2. Bhitarkanika National Park – The Mangrove Mystery</h3>If Simlipal is about dense forests and tigers, Bhitarkanika is all about mangroves, estuarine crocodiles, and exotic birds. Situated in the Kendrapara district, this unique national park is India’s second-largest mangrove ecosystem, after the Sundarbans.It’s especially famous for its saltwater crocodiles—the largest of which have been recorded at over 20 feet! You can explore the area by boat, gliding through emerald waterways surrounded by mangroves, kingfishers, and monitor lizards.Best time to visit: October to March Highlights: Boat rides, crocodile sightings, migratory birds, mangrove trails<h3>3. Satkosia Tiger Reserve – Where the Mahanadi Flows Wild</h3>Cradled along the gorge formed by the Mahanadi River, Satkosia Tiger Reserve is a less explored gem. With its stunning combination of dense forests, deep valleys, and riverine ecosystems, Satkosia is perfect for eco-tourism.Although tiger sightings are rare, the park is rich in biodiversity, including leopards, sloth bears, mugger crocodiles, and many species of deer and birds. It’s also ideal for camping under the stars by the riverbank.Best time to visit: November to April Highlights: River cruises, crocodile conservation, nature camps, trekking<h3>4. Chilika Lake and Nalabana Bird Sanctuary – A Birdwatcher’s Paradise</h3>While not a national park in the strictest sense, Chilika Lake—Asia's largest brackish water lagoon—deserves mention for its extraordinary birdlife. Located in Puri, Khurda, and Ganjam districts, the lake hosts over a million migratory birds every winter, including flamingos, pelicans, and rare species like the Asiatic dowitcher.Within Chilika, Nalabana Island is designated as a bird sanctuary and is a must-visit for ornithologists and photographers alike.Best time to visit: November to February Highlights: Birdwatching, boat safaris, dolphin spotting, island hopping<h3>Final Thoughts</h3>Odisha’s national parks are still off the beaten path compared to other Indian wildlife destinations, which makes them perfect for travelers looking for raw, unfiltered nature. Whether it’s cruising through crocodile-infested mangroves, hiking in tiger territory, or watching flamingos paint the skies pink—Odisha invites you to discover its wild side.So, pack your binoculars and sense of adventure. Odisha’s wild wonders await!

Odisha National Park

It's the 1st of February. Yesterday I decided that from tomorrow I will start writing on this website and publish it online. Some days will be great, some will be sad, some will be anxious, some will be full of lessons, some will just be a letter to my past to future self, while some will be the comfort for a stranger.&nbsp;&nbsp;I write because I love it. Writing is something that I never want to stop. I hope my writing will help someone someday. I always want to understand people, how they are feeling, what is bothering them, and the things they can't express to anyone and question themselves; I don't want that.&nbsp;Because they don't deserve that. Don't worry; you will be fine, and I will post an article on this website every day :)&nbsp;

My routine is all disturbed because of kids and her

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