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265 Public Journals
Grief
Grief
Does grief ever end?Lost my mum April 4, 2022. That day is forever engraved in my heart. She was my backbone and motivat…
i wish to die
i wish to die
actually, it's been 2 years since I have wished for this. yet, as none listens, I will wish again, and I heard the best …
What do I do with this love I had for him?
What do I do with this love I had for him?
I went through a breakup over a week ago now. Well, 10 days ago to be exact, because anyone who has been broken up with;…
Start anew
Start anew
I really don’t have much to say, but I’ve decided to go no contact with my family and increase my therapy session to onc…
blue
blue
I feel like I am leaving my everything behind. My social life, friends, happiness. There is no one I can confide in. (He…

a quick hello

10202023 "Economics by Ray Dalio"
Pengertian Mudah EkonomiEconomics intinya adalah "transaksi" yang terjadi berulang kali antara pembeli dan penjual, deng…

Betrayal? Or something like it.
You chose to live the way you do. I chose to “attempt” to love you through your mess. I realized very early on that i di…
Unavailable
Unavailable
We were never really together, it was just a facade but during the brief time I had you in my life I felt alive. I hadn’…
Feeling numb again
Feeling numb again
Yesterday i cried. Yet again. I am going to be 32 soon and i haven't married yet. The pressure and influx of thoughts of…
Attachment issues
Attachment issues
I thought I was over you… I truly did. I started eating again, I stopped rereading our messages wondering where I went w…

SCARED
I have tried hard all my life to break free. But I don't know what I need to break free from. I have always been scared.…
Heres to 22
Heres to 22
Well it’s officially my birthday and I couldn’t be more sad. I only have myself to celebrate with. I have no contact wit…
Adulthood sucks
Adulthood sucks
I still remember when I was a child I always thought about growing up. Now, I am 21, a young, lazy, or seemingly useless…
Reading Dostoevsky
Reading Dostoevsky
I was reading Dostoevsky and he is right in saying that utopia is bad. What we, as humans are moving towards is not what…
Anal Game
Anal Game
My teacher showed me so much today and we played a game that let me pump my butt so much with my brush. It was really ha…
Day 25
Day 25
It’s been 25 days since we last spoke. I know my last message to you said pretend I don’t exist and that you were my big…
I miss you
I miss you
Everyday I tell myself I’ll be okay and that I don’t miss you but the more I lie to myself the more it hurts. The love I…
My greatest heartbreak
My greatest heartbreak
You broke me completely but yet I still long for you. I can be doing random activities and my mind would drift to memori…

My inner turmoil
I’m not really sure what to say or how to even start but I guess I’ll just go for it. I’ve been struggling recently with…
whispers
whispers
Stretched like a mountainGalloping wild like a horseBeware of the shadowsThey lurk in the darkThe promise beheld in thei…