Papa's Pain - When he finally decided to move with me

Bhai/Bhabhi/kids bad behavior

Yogesh Paaliwal
Fri, 10/02/2020 - 21:32
Parents

I was sitting on Sofa, about to eat breakfast. When I got a call from my father. After asking about well-beings, he said I need to talk to you. I thought what was that. Is it about me or what. May thoughts were in my mind. He said, I will talk to you later.

He called me after about an hour.

He started with complaining about my bhabhi (Sister-in-law). He said, she crossed all her limits in saying bad words or bad mouthing. These days they used to sit outside house, in open street with his friends. Its common in these areas. Nothing bad.

He sad, we were talking and out of no where she shouted from top of house (from 3rd floor). You all old men(Budhe) are sitting outside and talking bad about their family persons. He said I never said bad things, but that I was saying something to them which she listened. 

And she shouted like anything, very insulting. Then she came down and started abusing them in front of everyone. My father said, she crossed all limits. And its not something new. But, now she crossed all limits and its intolerable now.

He also talked about my elder brother. They can not talk talk each other. He said, if I talk to him, some fight gets started. He don't talk to me in same house. He said I find ways to talk to him, but he never. And always gave a look like we are thieves sitting in house. Talking about my brother, he entered in house like they did something.

And, they have made their kids just like them. They also don't respect him now. 

Just to give a context. There are two floors in our house. On ground floor my parents lives and on first floor my brother's family. Their kitchen are separate.

He narrated another incident where he has to get his sofa repaired. He talked to few and gave order to someone. So my brother's son saw this and shouted very badly, what are you doing. You had to get new sofa, not repair. They live separately, but they order my father like anything. My father said, I will work as per my financial condition. And that kid (14 year) said much insulting things to him. He was like, why didn't you ask me.

Then, he (my brother's son) ran to his father's shop. Then, he called from his shop and started shouting again to my father. 

 

Then he started talking about past. He never shared those things with anyone till then.

Mother's Surgery

Recently, my mother had her knee surgery and she needed complete bed rest. My sister-in-law (Bhabhi) did their care by preparing all food. But, in my father's kitchen. With all their family member shifted there. My father used to do his expenses, just two of them (father and mother). Now they were 2 + 4 = 6 adults. And funny thing is that my sister-in-law did stopped their milk from milk-men. I mean all such expenses were borne by my father. My brother did nothing, not a single vegetable, nothing. And they did stay there for full one month. My father said, they did stay here with full luxury. He never said such things, but when he was on regular income, he was on pension. Also, he hired a maid for their house cleaning stuff. 

He said, if we are not well. Can't they offered to come at their place. They all came to my father's place. With all expense at my father's side. Very shameful.

Few months back, my sister-in-law was not well. Even then they came there at my father's place, with full expenses by my father for full 2 months.

My father used to bear lot of things. My brother's son's medication was going on. He was bearing full expense of this. And its like they completed all their pending wishes staying there. Kids were like wishing anything, and my father used to complete them. Which I know they never did when they stay in their house.

He said, they exploited him to the fullest. He used to buy things to my brother which he has to buy. Like, if he has to visit to my sisters, my father was buying things for him. Whenever somebody came to our house, they never bothered about this. Its my parents who takes care of all this.

 

Another incident

Few time before, they were coming from my place to house. Its common to ask about food (Lunch or dinner) as they were coming from 5 hour long journey. My sister-in-law refused straight away about giving food to my parents. Then, my father did not talk to them for long, like one year. 

Another incident

He said, I went upstairs to hang my mother's saree. The saree were dripping water. To which, my sister-in-law (Bhabhi) shouted, who will clean this. Come with dry cloths. My father did not share this with my brother. He said, after many days in some other fight, he mentioned this incident with my brother to which he said nothing, no action. He said, I can not even put cloths to dry in my own house, which I developed from my hands.

At My Sister's Place

Some time back, my sister-in-law went to my siste's place. And said I dont know when they will go from the house!

About my mother

Although, my sister-in-law said lot of things about my mother. but this is from my father's mouth. She said, "Abhi batati hun us haramzadi ko", and abused like hell.

About Their Kid

He said, all the time they did bad mouthing about me. Now, they don't have any value to him. Kids think that my father is foolish person. Now, they did not respect him. He said, I used to be the boss of a complete city when I was doing job.

Finally

My father never said these things, but even after all these things they treated him like shit.

He was in clear bad mood, and he finally said: I want to shift from here. Tell me. I want to come to your place, in a different flat, on rent. I was much surprised about this decision.

He said, let me know if you are comfortable. Else, I have no problem in going to other places who kept old people on payment basis. He said I had contacted them before, and I used to get their letters.

He was in full frustration, and asked me clearly if I have any issue. To which I made him calm and said, no issue. I offered to pay his rent also.

I suggested him many times, that you are in bad mood right now. Think over it, may be after 2 days. Then take a decision, since its a big decision of moving out. But he was well determined in his decision. He was well prepared with how he will move here.

He was also loved to be near my kids. He loved kids since long, be it any kid. 

He also asked do you have plan to shift to any other place. I said, I had but not now.

 

About Home

He gave example of our elder sister's father-in-law that he kicked his three sons out of the house. I can do the same to my elder brother. He told me not to tell anyone. He had few schemes about his house:

- Give complete house to my brother, and ask for some amount for his future rent.

- Give complete house to my brother, and ask for monthly payment.

- Give 3 rooms at rent, which was in his pocession.

I said, last option is better as you won't get any money from him.

About Flats

I talked to my known person about vacant flats in my society. And, found two flats. 

About Mannu Ki Shadi

So, our Mannu is about to get married. Its like first marriage in next generation. I asked him about this, that I hope there is no effect on that.

Memory from

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Daily Events/Journal Family

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Yogesh Paaliwal
Fri, 10/02/2020 - 21:32
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