No regrets!

from the memory

Isha Dhingra
Wed, 08/19/2020 - 21:04
No regrets

In 2017, I passed my 12th standard and as any other student I thought I'd be taking addmission in a college and would live a normal life. After all , that's what I'd wanted to do since my early teenage years. 

At first everything went according to plan.

After lots of studying for boards , I passed my examination and was ready to start my college life . But something happened that I could not explain in words, when all of the plans got wasted and I had to move with the flow . My personal life was on the upswing. My elders want me to study for government job so that I could take care of all my expenses as soon as possible . But deep inside me, I don't wanna be a person they want me to become. No one asked me what I would like to be instead what they want me to become and that just seemed to drain the life out of me. Mounds and mounds of books and so much pressure . You will be this! You will be that! . But what if nothing like this happened. No one wanna talk about what to do if you fail . I continued to grind out the work but grew more and more dissatisfied. I was frustrated and very depressed. To put it bluntly, I didn't like my life and saw no way that things were going to improve.  Have you ever face something like this where you felt the "weight of the world" on your shoulder? . I had!

Well, that's how I felt. I was literally hunched over.. and in pain. Both physically and emotionally. I began to get headaches all the time , and my stomach was constantly churning. Fearing that I had some serious health problem , I saw some doctors and they ordered a battery of tests. But there was nothing , it's all about the amount of stress inside my head.. I couldn't do something that I don't like.

How can be a person becomes a doctor when his passion is singing. Yeah these two are totally opposite things  . This day to day drudgery was also affecting my appearance.  I was burned out.

No regret

And , one particular evening, while sitting alone in my room, I knew that something had to change. Not knowing what to do, I simply said out loud,  " There's got to be more to my life than this.. there's got to be more than this misery and unhappiness". Now , I can't tell you that everything in my life changed overnight, because it didn't happen that way. But , from the moment I began to change my mind from what's they want me to do to what's really is my passion, I started to get significant results.  I drop what I was doing that's got nothing to do with my future , only making things worst. And start doing what could really help me seek what I want.  I took addmission in college instead dropping my graduation just to prepare for that government exam which actually make no sense. Along with it I did a job , well paid enough to help me with all my college expenses.  Those people might not ever guide me in future but I will make sure that to not let that situation come where I need them.  Atleast now I am satisfied enough with what all I have, if anything wrong happen, atleast I can blame myself instead blaming someone else and would definitely find a solution rather then regretting.  All I have to do was think , act and talk with enthusiasm. And I was actually attracting positive results.  So far my decision is paying me well, and for sure it will do the same in future as well. The funniest part was, their own kids are regretting following what their dad want them to be and not what they want themselves to be, and at the end they are neither this northat!.

So it's better to do what you love, because may be later but you will definitely be happy.

 

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Isha Dhingra
Wed, 08/19/2020 - 21:04
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